Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
