I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
