Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
