Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
