What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
this will be a night to untag.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Randomize
