.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
