I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
