I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
