Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
