i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
