a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
