Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
