I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
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