honey bunches of taint.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
