I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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