Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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