She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
