Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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