Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
