I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
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