I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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