stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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