Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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