DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
