sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
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