for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize