are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
