Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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