Fine. I'll sleep in my office
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
this boner is exhausting
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
