alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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