Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
