Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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