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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  Hey its my first time.

  (513): View more from Ohio

  I think you mean "it's my first time"

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...

  (716): View more from New York

  what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  self-loathing.

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"

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• (713): View more from Texas

  We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.

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• (914): View more from New York

  Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.

  (630): View more from Illinois

  oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...

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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night

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• (210): View more from Texas

  He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.

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• (713): View more from Texas

  She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.

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