I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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