so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
