I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
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