; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Randomize
