but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I still have a little drunk in my system
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
