I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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