Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
