I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
