so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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