i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
