So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
