hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
a search helicopter?!
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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