Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
