But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
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