Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
