Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
