no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize
